Thread of things people have said in all seriousness, which ought not be taken seriously

[Paulio]

Have you noticed that there has been some snow these past weeks? Because if I hadn't had the news informing me of this 24 hours a day I wouldn't have noticed. The well respected news broadcaster Look North helpfully furnished me with this information today:

Interviewee: You can put carrier bags in your shoes and wear socks on your hands to keep warm.
Look North: Thats good solid advice that is.

I also very much enjoyed their features on a man who had never seen snow before, a man wearing shorts, a headteacher who was slightly miffed about the snow, people having a snow barbeque, what a good job the managers of the gritting facilities are doing and an update on the conditions of various ski resorts around the world.

Another gem was Yorkshire Snow Heroes which gave us exclusive interviews with a man who'd built a wooden snow plough to put on his car and two children who shovel snow off their own road in the evenings. I personally can't help but feel this devalues the word hero and is a crime against those true snow heroes who have never had the opportunity to be part of a Look North award.

Yorshire Snow Hero Child: I've never seen this much snow before so I thought I'd clear it up.

[Tom]

for:
"Yorshire Snow Hero Child: I've never seen this much snow before so I thought I'd clear it up."
Read as:
"I was playing in the snow, having a whale of a time too! Then my beast of a mother presented me a shovel and told me to clean up the snow, and when i refused she beheaded my snowman. Just to show that she wasn't kidding."

Anyway yeah the news has been pretty dominated by the snow. If there was ever a time to oooh i dunno try and oust your Prime Minister from office and not have it capitulate your election chances then this was the week to do it. Luckily politicians are not opportunistic... oh. Right.

Seriously though the news seems to have taken a few knocks to the head. Why on earth do people need to be told its snowing? Most of us can see. Those that cant can tell its cold. Snow isn't news. A shortage of grit isn't interesting news. In fact i would equate that too a cat being stuck in a tree. SURELY something interesting must have happened this week. The PM being stabbed in the front would have been interesting had it not happened 3 times in 2 years. Jonathan Ross leaving the bbc is long overdue and not news. (i dont hate Jonathan Ross i just think he needs to move on to other projects). Whats Mugabe doing? He's usually doing something pretty horrific. Plus no snow in zimbabwe. Semi-fresh news for all!

[Christophe]

In-keeping with this snow fixation, I'd like to nominate the following headline from (who else?) the Daily Express the other day:

SNOW CHAOS... and they STILL claim it's global warming.

As one of the worst winters in 100 years grips the country, climate experts are still trying to claim the world is growing warmer.

We're all accustomed to people fundamentally misapprehending the science behind climate change, but whoever wrote that seems also to have misunderstood the concept of weather, as well having difficulty distinguishing between the words country and world.

But then, of course, it is the Express; it's entirely possible they've just chosen that as their lead story because its the only way to get people to pay attention to their existence.

[Tom]

stunningly today's express featured Madeline McCann on the cover. Proving once and for all that McCann is this centuries Diana. When the express cant think of news (which is often), just stick Maddie's face on the cover and watch the paper fly off the shelves... into the pockets of cretins.

The global warming story is just another example of the above. Snow does not prove anything about Climate change one way of the other. I assume the journalist knows this but assumes that his\her audience does not. It's actually pretty insulting if you think about it.

[Paulio]

Its like that irate woman on Question Time before Christmas who thought that because it had rained lots and there was flooding it was clearly the work of global warming. Speaking of which tis back on tonight. Huzzah!

You're right Tom I didn't even know there'd been a huge earthquake in Haiti until I watched PMQs as the news didn't seem to think anything else was important besides the presence of snow.

Do either of you ever watch PMQs? I enjoy watching Brown and Cameron wind each other up and nearly almost losing it with each other. Usually it ends up with Cameron shouting that his polcies are shit and Brown shouting well at least we have policies. In fact watching it makes me often like Gordon which is quite unsettling. Maybe its just my utter disgust at Cameron.

Also in the last one there was a minister who asked that something was done to hold a sniper to account in the Israeli military who shot a photographer helping to save children and was booed by a fair number of people. I thought that was a bit weird unless I've misunderstood what was being booed. I can only assume they were Tories as it was a Labour minister. Seems a bit off though.

[Tom]

I cant stand PMQ, it's just so archaic and ridiculous. Too much of the "my gang is better than your gang" mentality, which actually stops anything of substance being debated. In fact i think that PMQ is one of the main reasons for the nations disillusionment with politics, as when you hear the word politics you picture old men grunting at each other across a green room.

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